Colin AKA kalonZombie @kalonZombie@goblin.camp

WOAH WOW, did you know that I do a *PODCAST*? It's called Boogieman Buddies, and it's an actual-play Podcast that focuses on games that aren't D&D.

https://boogiemanbuddies.podbean.com/

We have an urban fantasy campaign using Monster of the Week, a superhero campaign using Masks, and other short campaigns using various other systems. We always have a lot of fun and tell some really good stories while we're at it.

Please give it a listen, and also consider giving this toot a signal boost. Thanks!

Series 6 Episode 1 - The Impossible Astronaut

This is an interesting one, at least. I don't know if it's *good*, but it's *interesting*. The Silence are a cool monster that I seem to remember staying fairly consistent in their rules, which makes them the best reoccurring Moffat monster probably ever. River, however, continues to keep becoming the fucking worst ever, being a Nixon apologist on top of everything else.

Anyway this is a two-parter.

Series 5 Episode 14 - A Christmas Carol

Honestly? This episode is pretty alright. There've been worse holiday specials I've seen in this series, and just doing Space Christmas Carol is a pretty novel idea, if a bit easy, but they have fun with it. I am, however, going to complain a bit about crossing personal timelines, even if it was a really good moment, because it was established fairly early in that you shouldn't do that, but Moffat keeps ignoring that.

Okay I think I'm done hating The Big Bang. I'll finish off Series 5 proper tomorrow.

...Later today. Fuck, it's 1 AM.

NO, ACTUALLY, I'M NOT DONE HATING THIS EPISODE YET.

So you're telling me that in a war against the Daleks not a single Tardis exploded? Ever? Why would the Tardis exploding crack space-time? Why would the Daleks team up with all the other DW villains? A year ago they were going to erase every universe ever for what equates to shits and giggles and now you expect me to believe they want to save it?

I'M NOT TRYING TO HATE THE MOFFAT ERA I SWEAR BUT GODDAMN HE MAKES IT SO EASY TO HATE

Series 5 Episode 13 - The Big Bang

What a weak fucking ending to the Series. Wow. Moffat really tried to pull a "This is the end, I'm saying my goodbyes" to a character that wasn't leaving on a show that wasn't ending. Just the most masturbatory kind of storytelling there is. Then he also has the fucking stones to go "We solved the mystery but not really". Moffat just does not know how to end things at all.

Fuck this finale. Weakest one yet. I tried but holy shit.

Series 5 Episode 12 - The Pandorica Opens

There's a lot of shit going on here that doesn't make sense, even from a storytelling perspective! Why are all of these aliens with no access to time travel showing up? Why is the Nestine Consciousness back with no explanation? Why would the Daleks care about saving the universe? Why does a Tardis exploding form cracks in the universe when there was a war where many Tardises for sure exploded? All these questions answered never

Series 5 Episode 11 - The Lodger

Hey, remember last episode where I really liked the Doctor and he was kind and caring and wanted to help people? Yeah, throw that out the window and make up for lost time and make him a completely insufferable asshole. This episode would have been so much better if 11 didn't act the way he did.

YOU'VE SHARED MEMORIES WITH PEOPLE BEFORE, DOCTOR, WHY DO YOU NEED TO HEADBUTT CRAIG?!

"Colin if you have 11 so much why don't you just skip to Series 8?"

Clearly you don't know how much I will put myself through just to watch the whole thing of a thing.

Series 5 Episode 10 - Vincent and the Doctor

Oh my god, this episode was... really, really fucking good. All my complaints about the Doctor the last few posts are nonexistent here. This is the kindest, most compassionate, most empathetic 11 has ever been. He wants to do nothing but help both the people and the "bad" alien around him. There's also no trace of the metaplot here. In a bubble this episode is fantastic and if 11 could act like this all the time I'd love him

Series 5 Episode 9 - Cold Blood

Another kinda nothing episode.

You know what else annoys me about 11? Inherently, "Doctor goes to violence as plan A" isn't a bad concept, since that's what I heard 12 is mostly like. It's just how fucking *SMUG* 11 comes off while doing it. He's not embraced the darkness around him but he's still acting like a warrior. At least 12 knows he's an asshole (I think, I've never seen any of 12's episodes).

Series 5 Episode 8 - The Hungry Earth

I completely forgot this episode and I can see why. It's completely average. Nothing special, good or bad. So instead I'm going to talk about why I don't like 11. He immediately jumps to violence in most aspects. 9 and 10 will bend over backwards to try and help the "bad" aliens but 11 just immediately jumps into "Threaten them until they leave" mode and it, combined with his "whimsy" just feels like a posh rich bully kid.

Series 5 Episode 7 - Amy's Choice

A relatively goofy episode that I enjoyed. It wasn't anything special but it was a fun romp that I ended up guessing the twist to about 40 minutes earlier than the Doctor did. I'm liking Rory quite a bit as a companion but I've been down this road before and know how he ends up, so I'm not going to try and invest too much into him.

Really, really not liking 11 though. He's a pompous jackass. I never watched Old Who but 6 was similar.

Series 5 Episode 6 - The Vampires of Venice

I liked this one! Weird goofy fish vampires were a fun monster and 11 is almost likable for the first time since episode 2. I just wish there was less focus on THE BIG MYSTERY every episode. It's starting to get annoying, but that's Moffat's thing I guess. Make a big mystery that he gets to shove in our face every episode to remind us there's a big mystery.

Anyway, fun episode.

Series 5 Episode 5 - Flesh and Stone

God this sucks. Moffat keeps coming up with new rules for his angels out of fucking nowhere and it's hard to keep up. River Song keeps being insufferable. Amy Pond keeps being useless and only bait for being in trouble. It all ends with Amy admitting she is super horny for the Doctor and wants to cheat on Rory with him, which is SUPER GROSS! I hate it and I hate everything about it.

The effects are alright, I guess.

Series 5 Episode 4 - The Time of Angels

A River Song AND an Angel two-parter, and hoo boy. It sure does do some really awful things. The Angels have had basically every rule about them rewritten and entirely new rules introduced out of the blue. Amy starts her descent into becoming completely useless, only something to be kidnapped or rescued, River Song begins her descent into becoming COMPLETELY insufferable, and 11 has had 2 completely unearned badass lines now.

Series 5 Episode 3 - Victory of the Daleks

Okay, here we go. This episode is bad. It's not TERRIBLY bad like Fear Her or Love & Monsters, but it's also not fun bad like Idiot's Lantern. It's just an average bad episode that introduces new, Power Ranger themed Daleks who don't really do much but we're supposed to believe are a threat. The only fun thing about this episode is the Doctor threatening them with a cookie.

Series 5 Episode 2 - The Beast Below

Another pretty good episode. Not GREAT, but not terrible either. 11 doesn't have nearly as much of a "Try to come off as quirky but actually just be a giant asshole" moment, Amy is helpful and useful, and the mystery is actually fairly cool. So far I'm thinking I dreaded this for nothing, but then again I got this far once.

Series 5 Episode 1 - The Eleventh Hour

As far as Moffat episodes go, this one was alright. My only big problem with it is for the first 10 minutes, 11 is basically an insufferable asshole trying to come off as quirky and funny. The monster was actually kinda nifty, Moffat does "Normal thing ever so slightly *off*" well enough. Honestly if you rewrote the first 10 minutes this would be a perfectly fine episode, but that really just soured it for me.

So overall, I like the RTD era. It's not a perfect beacon of light like how many Moffat detractors want it to be, but it's also not as bad as the RTD haters make it out to be either. There's some good stuff in there, and you don't even need to look that far! But also they spend two entire episodes going "farts are funny".

In the end, Doctor Who is a land of contrasts.

Anyway onto the Moffat era, which... ugh...