Colin AKA kalonZombie @kalonZombie@goblin.camp

Hello, my name is Colin. I used to go by kalonZombie for a long time so I still put that in my handles but you can just call me by my real name.

I run an actual-play podcast at http://boogiemanbuddies.podiant.co, and soon I will be getting a 13th Age game up where I actually do play as a Goblin. Her name is Chonnie and she accidentally burned most of a magic school down one time!

I also stream at www.twitch.tv/kalonzombie.

Please be gentle.

#intro

Hello everyone but especially you.

Oh thank god, TAZ:G ends tomorrow. That means I can start listening to TAZ again soon.

Mr. Trash Wheel, and his wife, Professor Trash Wheel.

Target is just Wal-Mart but clean, change my mind.

I like doing fun things in my campaigns with even the most minor of NPCs. I have a genderfluid superhero NPC whose power is to literally control water, and so their super form changes depending on what gender they currently identify with strongest at the moment.

The only time I ever want to see Trump in the news ever again is to hear he has been arrested or has died. Until then let's be content to never think about that fucker ever again.

[Extremely FF12 voice] Don't believe Lin Manuel's lies!

Hey, reminding you that Hamilton was a weirdo who wanted America to be a monarchy.

I'm on my completionist bullshit again, this time for Super Mario 3D World.

I've gone through the whole game (yes, including champions road) as Mario, now I'm starting the process of beating all the levels as the other characters. I'm done up through world 3, currently.

Today my vampire players did a bunch of combat! Woah!

Turns out Feral Weapons is real fuckin' good.

...Maybe Philosophy Tube, too. I've not watched their stuff though.

Oh, and Folding Ideas.

Okay maybe it's just Lindsay and Natalie who are shitheads.

The longer people on BreadTube exist the more I'm convinced HBomb is the only one of them worth a single solitary damn.

Instead of admitting that her worldview is probably slightly skewed by being white, she doubled down on some racist comments so hard she deleted her Twitter account out of shame.

I wouldn't get too excited though because I'm pretty sure she still runs Contra "Nonbinary People Confuse And Enrage Me And Therefore They Are Lesser People" Points' twitter account.

Breath of the Wild is a Bad Video Game.

Playing Breath of the Wild and I'm not even off the introductory area and I'm already *incredibly* bored.

This map is too big, too empty, and too unrewarding to justify its existence.

Watch out, Vault Dweller, the Deathclaw will slash your guts open and then stomp on your pizza.

Lootcrate, to my surprise, still exists, and even has *extremely specific* niche Lootcrate variants, including one for Fallout. In order to keep you hooked for multiple months, they send you a Deathclaw figurine, one bit at a time. You get the head one month, the left arm the next, etc etc.

...The thing looks the fucking Noid.

My journey to discovering that I'm a monsterfucker was pretty simple when I found out that I don't want a fursona but I *would* fuck a werewolf.

The Pillar Men are just not hatable enough, except for Kars, who has little to no personality that isn't just Discount Dio.