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and they named him Milvendil, or "Milf-friend", in the old milvish

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banned from my local pro shitting league for using performance-enhancing drugs

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Medieval Chad/Virgin shitpost 

why does the Chad Noble get to live in the inner castle while us serfs are stuck out here toiling in the fields? why does Lady Veronica always go for the asshole knights who will just treat them badly? us serfs have developed superior dexterity from working with our hands all day, which means better stamina and performance in bed. we really do live in a freaking monarchy, peasants rise up

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dude i don't give a flying fuck. i don't give a running shit. i don't give a rolling piss

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going absolutely apeshit in my lord's wheat fields

ok the south park rp accounts were bad but there yet exists an untapped evil... big bang theory rp accounts

Potato Head has "head" in their name, but they consist almost entirely of a head; thus, while their head is a potato, so is their body, for their body is their head, and their head is their body.

Spongebob Squarepants, on the other hand, has a body that also consists mostly of his face. On the other hand, a delineation between his head and the rest of his body is established through him wearing pants, an article of clothing so essential to his identity that it is in his name.

In this essay I will

if I ever get a car the only bumper sticker I have will simply read "pain"

waking with dinosaurs says that diplodocus is the biggest animal that will ever walk the earth and I feel like that's very pessimistic.

screeching out "who chilling" at subsonic frequencies

how about the calm and collected videogame nerd

shaking my head hard at this drawing of a bottle labeled only "magic potion". what kind of effect does it have? a real alchemist would label their potions in greater detail, fucking amateurs

girls do podcasts called 'wine crime' where they pretend to be drunk, call serial killers hot and appropriate aave. boys do podcasts called 'the penis cheney experience' where they talk about aocs feet and use an air horn sound effect 'ironically'. they both should be banned.

carefully applying herbs and spices to my blade so it's not quite as bland when my foes taste it

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