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and they named him Milvendil, or "Milf-friend", in the old milvish

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banned from my local pro shitting league for using performance-enhancing drugs

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Medieval Chad/Virgin shitpost 

why does the Chad Noble get to live in the inner castle while us serfs are stuck out here toiling in the fields? why does Lady Veronica always go for the asshole knights who will just treat them badly? us serfs have developed superior dexterity from working with our hands all day, which means better stamina and performance in bed. we really do live in a freaking monarchy, peasants rise up

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dude i don't give a flying fuck. i don't give a running shit. i don't give a rolling piss

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going absolutely apeshit in my lord's wheat fields

CDC said that if you're at a buffet and the serving spoon falls into the tray, it's cool to just use your hands and grab a pile of lukewarm macaroni & cheese to plop right onto your plate.

the press release goes on to add "no worries, we're all friends here. pass me a lump of that sweet cheesy mac!"

just got my second dose lxds, fingers crossed I get one of the cool superpowers like shooting laser beams from my dick

gonna watch anime, dubbed to german, with dutch subtitles, that way no anime fan can possibly be happy

*nibbling straight through the banana foreskin*

i want someone to rip out my spine and crack it like a whip, my neck is so tight

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