𝔏𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔊𝔬𝔟 @pizza@goblin.camp

john venn: ok now fellas, i know you all hate me for my obsession with making diagrams, and also for my obsession with set theory, but which of you hate me for both? observe,

two cats having a thumb war

Watching movies with Spooky

@HYPERLINK @pizza @bobby_newmark @catoutofbed @dankwraith

“Would you like a happy ending?” The hostess asks, “he’s very good”.

“No that’s ok”, I say nervously. I hadn’t realized it was that kind of place.

“Are you sure? He’s very good”

Sonic appears suddenly by my side, his small warm hand grasps my pinky finger like a lollipop.

“I’m very good” he squeaks, grinning.

“Very. Good.” The hostess s

hi. i’m a general in a strategy game. all ten of my wives died. i don’t question this

charging my vape with the michelin man

if you are within a mile radius of sonic the hedgehog, that's an unsafe distance

Marie Kondo: get rid of it if it doesn't spark joy

Me: see you in hell, faded & shrunken & stained t-shirt

Me 6 months later: oh my god... where is my pineapple shirt... it was the only thing that brought me joy in my entire life, what have I done

sonic the hedgehog's prey drive is so terrifyingly strong that he could get shot in the leg and still keep going. it wouldn't snap him out of it. his brain is wired to kill

@pizza running as edging. sonic is a little pervert. he loves it

everyone thinks that the speed is sonic's favorite part of running fast but they're wrong. he likes the stopping. he likes pursuit because it ends in pouncing. running is foreplay to him

Lol look at me as a 6 year old dancer

go watch some hot fuckin esports

@pizza @bobby_newmark @Excuse_haver @catoutofbed @dankwraith "Too hard!" you can shout to sonic as he manhandles the bare skin of your back. "You're hurting me". Sonic does not listen. His eyes are black and dull as he does his work upon you. The next day you find your back is streaked with red marks and they don't go away for a week